Most people don’t think about it, but when you lie to your partner about your financial standing or hide purchases or keep secret stashes, you are being dishonest no matter how you attempt to justify it.
Yes, even having that secret credit card to buy those shoes you can’t live without is deceitful.
A marriage should not only be about honesty, but working together for success. That includes your financial success.
I have a lot of people who tell me that their family always taught them to have a secret account just in case.
My response is always, “Just in case what?” If you are starting your relationship with an exit plan, maybe you need to reevaluate the person you are thinking of spending the rest of your life with.
The way your family treated money doesn’t need to be the way that you do. There’s a lot of things my family has done that I would be ashamed to do, and money is no different.
Don’t mimic what your family members do if it’s not supportive of the life or relationship you desire. Learn from their mistakes. If your aunt is giving you this advice, and she’s on her fifth husband, that might tell you something. If it’s your sister trying to help, but her husband is unhappy because he feels like a child living on his mother’s allowance, there’s a problem.
Take the positive aspects from other people, get rid of the negative, and consider the source.
On this episode of the Redefining Wealth Podcast, we are joined by a power couple: Tai and Talaat McNeely. These two started off their relationship on the wrong foot, financially, but overcame their struggles together.
Now they have a wonderful relationship that’s open and honest about their finances, and something they have learned to work on together.
Download this episode today to learn the mistakes they made early in their relationship, and how they learned to overcome their financial problems by being a team.
[bctt tweet=”“Are you interpreting what your parents did with their money through the correct lens?” – @HisandHerMoney” username=”seekwisdompcw”]
The Cliff Notes:
- The McNeely’s are the same on and offline.
- When people are new and come up to you, don’t be pretentious.
- If you live in a world that is completely financed, it will only lead to trouble.
- You have to be consistent or you will fall back into old habits.
- Don’t start a marriage on a lie.
- Most people are dedicated to the wedding day, not the future.
- We want to jump into the dollars and cents, but we really need to concentrate on the mindset shift.
- Many men have a problem being vulnerable.
- Sometimes you have to change your vocabulary to win.
- Learn to surrender and ask for help.
- Work together on finances, don’t let one person take complete control.
- Many parents don’t talk about finances with their children.
- Stop nagging and teach your mate by example.
- When you buy things behind your partner’s back, that’s financial infidelity.
- Having secret finances on the side can be a clue that you have more problems.
[bctt tweet=”“If you’re doing it behind the person’s back, that’s infidelity.” – @HisandHerMoney” username=”seekwisdompcw”]
Links:
Tai and Talaat’s Website
Tai and Talaat’s Twitter
Tai and Talaat’s Podcast
Tai and Talaat’s YouTube